Ah, the irony of the great outdoor experience. It’s Sunday morning on a powder day and you can’t wait to inhale face shots and fresh air. But first comes one of the nastiest olfactory gauntlets known to man — 11-minute imprisonment in a ski tram filled with burping, farting, hungover, alcohol-reeking skids who wear putrified unwashed long underwear, fetid ski socks, and have chronic particulate and mangy dog hair clinging to their nappy woolen hippy hat. And somebody has a bacon and onion breakfast burrito shoved in their parka pocket. And Red Bull spilled on their shirt. It’s a wonder no one hurls.
And speaking of hurling, have you even been on a turbulent plane and had a nearby passenger blow chunks? Or taken a bus ride across Central America and your seatmate doesn’t just smell like goat, he is a goat? Or done your pre-race business in a hot house porta-potty sweltering in the summer sun?
For all the refreshing, soul-rejuvenating, and delightful aromatherapies the adventure world has to offer, there are an equal or greater number of smells that make you recoil in disgust — many of which, it turns out, come directly from you. Decomposing bike chamois, anyone?
So which is the worst? Pick up to three. Extra credit if you name names in the comments.
WIN SMITH SUNGLASSES JUST BY VOTING!
This week, one poll participant will receive Smith Optic’s Ridgeway sunglasses. We’ll pick the winner via random number generator (and announce it here) — all you have to do to enter is vote and leave a comment so we have your email to contact you. Must have a U.S. or Canadian address. Contest ends Sunday, December 16, at midnight PST.